Handsome hubs and I have been married for almost three years. We’ve actually known each other since junior high; time does go by faster as you get older. We didn’t speak to each other for years after high school, but once we reunited we both knew it was meant to be. I love this man to the moon and back, and yes he would lasso the moon for me. Truth, marriage is work. That last sentence sounds so negative, but it’s honest. It is work I’m willing to do and in return, it has the biggest reward. Unconditional love. The hardest part about being in a relationship is realizing how selfish I can be. I do this, I need this, I want. The start of our relationship came so easy…why? I wanted him to be happy. I brought him lunch, did his laundry, and picked up his socks around the house. Not because it was expected of me but because I wanted to. I wanted to take care of him and that made me feel good. As my relationship matured, I lost sight of that. Instead of focusing on what made him happy I started to compare what we each contributed to the household. That is not a good outlook. Comparing one another’s value in a relationship will only bring negative emotions and make situations worse. I had to take a step back and take a look at the whole picture. I admit sometimes I have “Uyen glasses” on. I like to argue my point of view and show I have an imprint in the world. I want to prove to my husband I’m a strong and smart woman. When in reality I don’t need to prove a thing because he does think all those things and more. Instead of focusing on the negative and what I felt he didn’t do, I evaluated my role- what I contributed to the relationship. I realized we are on the same team. We might see things differently on some subjects but as long as we maintain that respect for each other, our relationship will keep blossoming. He challenges me to be a good person and in the grand scheme of things, isn’t that one of our purposes in life? To make one another better? That’s one of my goals at least. Lance and I made a commitment to one another and decided that putting each other first is a must. Making my other half happy has in return made me happy. Light bulb moment…the LOVE comes full circle. That thought makes me smile. When we keep that in mind, we’ve been the giddiest.
Here are five ways to spark in your relationship.
1. Have a conversation. With no distracting elements (no phones, tv, computer, etc). Think about the last time you had a conversation where you felt like your partner was really listening to you. Take a time out from electronics and you will feel more connected to your better half.
2. Cook each other breakfast. Take turns on this one. Nothing better than to start a day with a meal made by the one you love.
3. Post it love notes. You can never hear I love you enough right? Even if you say it everyday, jot a little somethin-somethin and leave it somewhere unexpected. Example, I left a love note on hubs’ steering wheel, so when he left for work he’d find it.
4. Attack a house project together. This will test your team work. Have good communication and know that you have the same goal in mind- to finish the project, ha! Lance and I are currently practicing this one right now. He’s helping me renovate my studio/office and he has been so amazing. I do have to do a little shout out here. I have one of the most supportive husband’s ever! He believes in me no matter what and I am truly lucky.
5. Laugh with each other. There is nothing sexier than to be yourself, so let your guard down. Laughter is contagious and can instantly improve your mood. If you are happy, most likely your mate will be happy!
Keep your love brewing…xoxo!